WMAS – Washing Machine Aversion Syndrome is an affliction that affects many, but is rarely spoken about. In the main it seems to afflict men once they start a family. As parenthood hits, men who were previously capable of doing the washing and other household chores, become unable to function as they once did. Symptoms can escalate rapidly. Sadly, many WMAS are oblivious to the fact they have the syndrome and it is their partners who are left to pick up the pieces.
WMAS Onset:
A curious phenomenon occurs at the onset of parenthood. Those afflicted with WMAS become less and less engaged with the process of doing the washing, to the point where they no longer know how to use the washing machine. In severe cases, suffers can be spotted looking blankly at the big white machine with the window at the front and wondering what it is.
If you are concerned that your husband or partner might suffer from WMAS, here are the signs to look out for:
- Poor coordination – increasing difficulty getting dirty clothes into the washing basket
- Paralysis – sporadic, decreasing to zero, use of the washing machine
- Impaired vision – unable to see when the washing basket is brimming over
- Loss of hearing – inability to notice when the machine has finished a load that needs hanging out
- Confusion – inability to work out how to operate the washing machine, despite being adept at Playstation, iPhone, Mac…
A Case Study:
Luci, a wife and mother from Hackney, East London comments on her husband’s chronic case of WMAS:
His symptoms have been severe for a while now, the condition started to take a grip once we decided I wouldn’t return to work at the end of my maternity leave. I realised things were really bad a couple of weeks ago when my husband came home from a fishing trip.
A fully functioning adult would put their dirty clothes into the washing machine, perhaps even look in the washing basket to see if there was anything else to add, before turning the machine on. But my husband, a WMAS sufferer, took off his smelly jeans and top and put them on the floor by the washing machine. As a result of being afflicted by the Syndrome, he thought he was doing me a favour.
The most recent WMAS flare up came a couple of days ago. We were both in the kitchen, he was cooking breakfast – he is a modern man after all. I shoved a load of washing into the machine and turned it on. As the machine got under way, my husband looked perplexed and started wandering around the kitchen with his ear cocked. He then slightly nervously asked, “what’s that noise?”
Finding A Cure
It is easy to think that you can reason with a WMAS sufferer, but this isn’t always the way to instigate change and help them to throw off the shackles of the syndrome. A team of leading scientists from the University of Life are currently working on research to find a cure for WMAS.
Unbeknown to her husband, Luci has agreed for herself and her husband to take part in the study. As such, Luci is following the guidelines set out by the scientists. The aim is to use shock therapy to rid her husband of WMAS. The first step is for Luci to create a blog post, to draw her husband’s attention to his condition and shock him into doing something about it.
If this doesn’t work, the second step is for Luci to instigate a steaming row. Both the scientists and Luci hope that it won’t come to this.
Please do share your story if you live with a WMAS sufferer. The more partners of sufferers who can come together to discuss this debilitating syndrome, the greater the likelihood of finding a cure.
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